Do you ever wonder what’s the point of keeping a clean house? Here’s how to find motivation and why I make my bed every day (even if I barely have time).
A while back I shared a list of “simple rules” that I wanted my family to live by–something I was planning to hang up as a little daily reminder. It included things like “be kind,” “eat your vegetables,” and “always do your best.” Funnily enough, the one thing people commented on more than any other was a line I honestly hadn’t thought twice about including: Make your bed every day.
Is this really a novel concept?
I have to admit that I am slightly obsessive about making our bed each morning. And even my husband, who used to make fun of this obsession, has now embraced it. In fact, these days he might be even more obsessive than me!
But it’s not just the bed. Most of the time, our house is pretty neat. Speed Cleaning is my jam–I love doing a quick sweep of the house every day. We also require our kids to make sure their room is tidy before they leave for school.
Why I Make My Bed: 10 Reasons I Keep My House Clean
Until I posted that innocent-seeming list, it never even occurred to me that these habits might be considered odd. Even so, when I really started to think about it, I realized there are some serious reasons why I take the time to make my bed and tidy up each day.
1. It just looks better.
This should be fairly obvious right? Straightened sheets and comforters with pillows in their proper place are far more aesthetically pleasing than disheveled blankets and a pile of pillows on the floor. A sink full of dirty dishes just looks ugly, whereas I could stare at my clean and sparkly kitchen all day long. Likewise, toys and clothes off the floor and put away are so much prettier than things scattered everywhere.
2. I get more done when my house is clean.
Taking the time to focus on putting things in order–especially when I set the timer and race against the clock–seems to jumpstart my productivity. When I ignore the mess and try to work around it, I am more easily distracted by whatever comes my way, and at the end of the day I’ll find I accomplished almost nothing. It doesn’t mean I always keep my house clean, but I do get more done on the days that I do.
3. I’m not embarrassed to have people over.
I love entertaining and throwing parties and get-togethers, & greatly value hospitality. When my house is clean I am more likely to invite someone over on the spur of the moment.
4. I can find things.
This part of my life has greatly improved since our Great Purge in December, when we got rid of SO much stuff. Now that everything has a rightful place once again, it is so much easier to put it away and–surprise surprise–to find things again when we need them.
5. My kids play better.
My children have the incredible ability to make a mess instantaneously. Do your kids possess this talent? Sometimes it seems like they spend their entire day just dragging stuff out so they can leave it on the floor. During our great purge I got rid of 4 huge bins of toys, and there is still more purging yet to be done. I have noticed, however, that when we keep their room clean (and I do make them help with this), they actually play much better. Just like me, they can find the things they are looking for and focus on just one thing at a time instead of being overwhelmed by 5,000 toys staring at them from the floor.
6. It makes my husband happy.
Who wants to come home after a hard day’s work to a house full of chaos? There are far too many days when Husband comes home at 5:30 and the kids are hungry and crabby and screaming, dishes are piled in the sink, dinner isn’t made, and the rest of the house is a disaster. (For the record, he never says anything negative and will dig right in and help with dinner, then do the dishes.) But on the days the house is clean and dinner is made and the girls happily run to greet him at the door, there is an unspoken joy that lights up his face.
7. It saves money.
Taking care of my home and my things means I am less likely to need to replace something that gets lost or broken. When things are messy I want only to escape the clutter, which can often mean going to Target and mindlessly filling a cart with even more stuff we don’t need. When things are clean, I have no desire to be any place but here.
8. I am more creative.
Instead of seeing nothing but the mess, my mind is clear to see the creative potential around me, and my desk and table are clear to spread out and complete a project. Likewise, when my kitchen is clean, it makes me want to cook things! I know this doesn’t bother some people, but I have a really hard time creating anything–or enjoying the process–when I am surrounded by clutter.
9. It helps me get a good night sleep.
There is nothing I love more than crawling into a carefully-made bed. It is so comforting! Rather than needing to wrestle with tangled sheets or scoop up blankets from off the floor, I am instantly relaxed and ready for a night of rejuvenation. Even if I can’t manage to get to the rest of the house, I almost always make my bed because I hate sleeping in a messy bed. A made bed just feels better, the blankets stay on all night long, and I sleep much better.
10. It’s my job***.
When I signed up to be a stay-at-home mom, I agreed to all the duties that came with it, including keeping house. It’s not my husband’s responsibility to go to work all day then come home and do my job too. Yes, I work too, but my “work” is secondary to my primary job of Mom.
This is not a sexist thing. Early in our marriage, we agreed that a.) one of us would always stay home with our kids and b.) that the one at home would be responsible for running the household. In fact, when our oldest daughter was a baby, he was the stay-at-home parent for a year-and-a-half. During that time, he did it all–cleaning, cooking, groceries, & childcare–while I went to work, and he did an amazing job. I owe it to him to do the same.
To summarize, here are the Top 10 Reasons why I Make My Bed and Keep My House Clean:
- It just looks better.
- I get more done when my house is clean.
- I’m not embarrassed to have people over.
- I can find things.
- My kids play better.
- It makes my husband happy.
- It saves money.
- I am more creative.
- It helps me get a good night sleep.
- It’s my job***.
There are plenty of days where my house is a complete and utter disaster. In fact sometimes by the end of the day it is a disaster even when I do spend time cleaning up. And that’s life. I try not to get too down on myself on those days I can’t quite pull it all together, but most of the time I do at least make an attempt. Because, when all is said and done, if my house is clean and my bed is made, I just breathe a little easier.
What would you add (or remove) from this list?
***UPDATE: This post is now a few years old, and while I still agree with everything I wrote, the one thing that has changed a bit are our stay-at-home parent roles. I am now the primary breadwinner for our family, while my husband stays home. That means that he now takes full responsibility for much of the day-to-day cleaning and laundry, though I am still the chief organize and bed-maker! I realize that we are very fortunate to be able to have one parent solely focused on running our home, and this post is in no way meant to be an affront on those of you who work full time and can’t always keep up. Keeping a house clean is thankless, never-ending job whether you are home full time or not. This post was only ever written a reminder of why I continue to work at it, even if it just gets messy again, and meant as encouragement for those of us who sometimes need a little extra motivation to get it done!
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Ruth Soukup
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I never made my home in any of our previous homes, but then we bought our first home. I finally had space to put all our things, I was suddenly home a lot more hours a week with our second child and I spent time in my room. I don’t completely, “make the bed.” However, I do pull up the covers and sheets to look reasonable now, and I love it. But I think that it is more the life style changes that i love and finally feeling like I fit in the space that I live in.
I completely subscribe to the importance of making your bed. I think it also (albeit, in a small way) can help with depression. A friend once told me part of depression is feeling like your life is out of control. Making your bed, immediately if possible upon rising, can give you a sense of control of your immediate surroundings. From there, I think it also begets positive ripples of getting other things in control.
I agree with your posts and your reasoning. It was refreshing to read and gave me some needed energy to clean my home today. However, I think that most of the comments are being made by people who share your same views. From experience and being in the homes of many people, I know that many people do not have clean homes and may not have it as a priority. There’s SO much good that comes from keeping a clean home but there’s also a limit to how obsessive you should be with it. It can come to the point where others actually DON’T feel comfortable in your home because they are afraid to touch anything and are embarrassed to have you over because they are not like you. I am not naturally a tidier. I have to try really hard to keep my home clean because the little mess (that eventually turns big) doesn’t bother me as much as others. I don’t have a dirty, filthy, or even a cluttered house, but I usually have some dishes in the sink and I admit that I do not make my bed everyday. I am working hard on improving this but during the process I still want to be happy. Everyone has their weaknesses, some more “visible” than others 🙂 I am trying to find the balance because obsessing over cleanliness all day long is not the answer for me. I’d love to hear more about how others balance keeping a tidy home with not being obsessive. I’ve also felt so much pressure from moms who keep their homes super clean. I hardly ever feel comfortable when they’re in my home and when their children are over all they do is comment on my imperfections. I’ve decided that I want a clean home but I also want others to be comfortable around me and not feel judged. Sometimes this means allowing others into our home when it’s not exactly perfect. Anyways, a little bit of a ramble but I just wanted to share my thoughts. I really did love this post and it has helped me, thanks!
Brava! I too keep a clean home. I love coming home and the ahhh feeling that greets me when I walk in the door. I make my bed everyday, put things away and tidy up before I start a new activity. I am okay when I have unexpected company, my place is clean. My friends say my place is zen. Cleanliness is next to Godliness has always been one of my favorite adages. I was called OCD by a co-worker. I asked her what was the opposite of OCD and she never bothered me again.
I agree with about 90% of this.
Where I have a hard time are the parts about “keeping husband happy” and “it’s my job.” I understand that being a stay at home mom means more responsibility in housekeeping. This is pretty obvious. But I have found that too many husbands come home to a tidy house after being away all day and don’t fully understand just how much effort goes into making it that way. Then, to “relax” they trash the kitchen, the living room, the bedroom, and the next morning go away to work again. Just like Sometimes I feel like someone needs to tell husbands that just like they don’t like coming HOME to a messy house, wives don’t like to WAKING UP to a messy house and they should be considerate. BOTH of you live there. BOTH of you should put in the work. I’m not saying that you were disagreeing with this, just trying to make it clear.
Also, I do not consider keeping a tidy house a part of my “Mom” job description. I consider it part of being a family member who spends time at home. This means that when my children can help, they will. That on the weekends and at night, my husband helps. I did not become a stay at home mom to keep my house clean. I became a stay at home mom to focus on my relationships with my children. Yes, this means teaching them to work and clean, but this is not the largest part of WHY I do it. If it was, I would go back to work in a second.
Carrie, you hit the nail on the head fr me. I really loved this comment and was wading through all the moments to see if there was someone I could relate too. Thank you!
Thank you, thank you, thank you, Carrie! I am married with four kids who are all active in extracurricular activities, and I have a full time job. There are days when I was a SAHM that I would tell my husband, ok, you stay home, and I will go and only work for 8 hours out of the 24 there are in a day. That would be much easier!!
I agree with you Carrie. I work 30 hours in a job that can be very stressful, take care of a disabled son and a struggling 20-year old with 2 cats & dogs. There are days I want to pull the covers over my head and stay in bed never mind making it! I agree that having a clean and tidy home is good for the soul and the mind, but there are times when I can barely make it through the day or night without some calamity happening. But I start every day with a hopeful heart that today will be the day the motivation kicks in and I can be proud of my home. I do envy SAHM and which I could do it, but also realize its hard work!
AMEN! Before I was a stay at home mom to 3, I wasn’t the only one doing the cleaning. I was teaching full time & we split it then. Now that I’m home ( which having 3 kids 4 & under is what I do ALL day), we both still live in the same house, and we both still use the same dishes, use the same bathroom….The kids clean up their toys, help put away some of their laundry that they can. But never did I say when I was going to become a stay at home mom to raise my kids, that I was going to be the primary house cleaner. That probably differs within each relationship. I also grew up with a dad that did a lot of cleaning and cooking also.
Thank you for this! I thought I was the only one feeling a little insulted. My husband and I also agreed that the lions share of the home would be my end of contributing to the family – but not to keep my husband happy OR because it was my WORK . My job is being a mom – my contribution to the whole of a working family is doing what I can when I can when Im not focused on being MOM. The same goes for him – while his JOB is bringing home the bacon his contribution to the family is helping out in any which way when he can. I am glad that this works for them and they have found something but I don’t think its the model for how things should work – just how it works for them.
I think this Ruth’s OCD has become her new clutter. Her life and her time is cluttered with her obsession with tidiness. I find her writing judgmental and sanctimonious. Quit shaming women that don’t share your obsession. I’m sure that’s not your intention, but that’s what you’re doing. If you’re obsessed with chasing your idea of a perfectly tidy everything, go for it. You wanna take all your kids stuff? Go ahead. But this de-clutter, minimalist, mantra has become your compulsion, just like shopping was. You’ve simply replaced one thing for another. Kids with possessions have no less fun and imagination as yours. Couples in unmade beds have just as much love. We had friends like you and being in their house was excruciating and uncomfortable. We dreaded being there and could never be ourselves. I read everything on your site because I was curious what all the fuss was about. I won’t be back.
Exactly! I’m glad someone pointed these things out that you did. I totally 2nd what you said!
Hey, my husband’s office is as messy as our house. When he cleans his office daily, I will clean the house daily. His job is to work and bring home the pay, my job is to raise the kids and make sure they don’t kill themselves or anyone else. To those of you who can and want to keep a clean house at all times: Good for you! To the rest of us who’d rather not obsess about a spotless floor or sink: keep up the good work!
Thank you! I feel the same way! Yes, I try really hard to keep the house picked up, etc. but I am staying home because I want the amazing relationship and precious memories with my little girl that I didn’t get with my mom. It is my JOB to me a MOM! It is my families job as a whole to take care of the house! My husband can be pretty messy but does his responsibilities and our daughter and I have ours! Works great for us.
YES! Thank you, Carrie. Very good thoughts and responses to this article. I have three little ones with one on the way, and it is refreshing to hear you voice a balancing perspective. I agree!
Beautifully put. Hubby does everything obvious + cooking (his hobby) & I do all the stuff he can’t do..plan, organize, project manage.
All I can say to your reply, Carrie, is, ‘Yes! Yes! Yes!’ and give you round of applause. There were so many points she made that I literally gasped at while reading. Let’s just say, Ruth and I think starkly different on many issues in this post. I still enjoy reading her content though.